Old days, I miss you :)

Hello, I miss the whole days. When I hang out with all my besties & darlings and have so much fun. I looked through all the photos I’ve taken for the past 2.5 years and I’m so amazed of all the things I’ve went through. Some of which I almost couldn’t recall till those photos trigger back the awesome memories :D Though I’m single now, though I so wish I could be somebody’s, though I so wish to be pampered like a princess, though at times I was attached by that lonely-Im alone feel, I want to thank god! From the bottom of my heart, for giving me such a blessed life. Life has been pretty great for me & I shall no longer ponder so much & make it difficult for myself. I shall stop regretting decisions I’ve made over and over again. Look back Peckyong, all have been so well for you! :D

Don't say, anymore

Sometimes there’s nothing to say. Sometimes silence expresses more than words. Picking up the phone, dialing a number, it can do more damage than good. But humans are afflicted with this obsessive desire to talk things to death. So we make things worse by trying to make things better.

Lao Di Fang

Lao Di Fang
9 Penang Road, #B1-12 Park Mall, S238459

Previous Review

Sambal Fish is damn good; it was so spicy we just keep wanting more!

Desserts are my fav :D

Fav cake: Rasberry Cheese Cake :D
I had my first Rasberry Cheese Cake somewhere in Vivo with my first love, & I fall in love with it immediately :D
Couldn't find anything close to that taste any longer idk why :(

I don't really like to try new favors. In fact I don't really like to try new things. But I always do, in the end.
I love to stay in comfort zone, I dislike changes. Though I don't seem like one. I hate it when you are used to that someone, then he or she left you.
讨厌让你习惯他了，又选择离开。

On a side note, Ray ray aka banana boy is my favorite boy :D
I wish I'm his mummy, hahaha.
He used to be mischievous, running all around, climb up and down giving me a hard time; but I still love him.

He has a little brother now so he carry himself better :D

Dinner at Classic Lao Di Fang for dinner :)
Eunice's favourite restaurant to celebrate her belated birthday :)
Happy Belated Gorgeous :))

Then again,

& then I realized I was too harsh last night.
How selfish could I be. He said he went through a hard time to make this decision. I should have trusted him. Though I know the rest would kill me if I were to think this way.
But he's not that bad by nature. Really. He isn't a playboy. Because till the end, I believe that he didn't play me.
That I shouldn't have judge him right from the start.
Maybe we just aren't meant to be.
So boy, I really do hope you will meet a better girl, a better someone whos really worth your wait, someone who will touches your heart and make you love like no others. Someone who genuinely love you in return and have your happily ever after.
I'll pray for you. Just, don't ever do things for the moment, or give words and promises at that moment when you aren't sure how much you can deliver or if you can take that responsibility.
Everything else about you us great, really.

Unexpectedly

I know and I knew that it will happen some day. But not this soon.

Maybe it was really too much of me. For making him wait that long.
Maybe it was really me that I'm such a fickle, think too much about the future, that I dont dare to try it out, to give both of us that chance. Maybe I was really a coward, that I don't dare to get hurt. Maybe I was really too selfish, to commit and love another.
But I don't think I'm such a cold blooded person.
Or maybe, I'm just wrong. I'm just not good enough to worth his wait.
That I can no longer try to help him be a better person. Maybe all the faults lie with me.
I can't because, he's tired and start forgetting all the little things he sacrificed for me. Maybe I really went overboard and demand for too much.

Maybe I'm not the person he should waste his effort and time on and he realizes that.

Ya. Tonight will be the final night it's happening. I'll cry myself to sleep cause I don't want to hold it back anymore.
And TMR, I'll be a different person. Someone tougher. I won't believe that any guy would change for me. I won't take words from guys like him. I won't. Trust. Anymore.

It's so so hard. I was warned by the whole world. Yet I chose to trust him.
And this is what I get in return.
Being too innocent, I was just dumb.
So for now, i will love myself more than anything else.
No one else can hurt me anymore.

So much hope I have in this world..
He destroy all my hope. And now I'm force to view the world as such a horrible place. Full of jerks out there who love themselves more than anything else. And now, I just have to do the same, to protect myself.

To be in love

Now i feel this way. I want to fall in love. I want to fall desperately and uncontrollably in love. I want my every breath to be as important to his existence as it is to my own. I want to feel empty inside when he's not beside me. I want to feel absolutely perfect when his arms are around me. I want to be miserable when he's unhappy. I want to be ecstatic when his life is going good. I want to be co-dependant. I don't want to be alone. I want to be loved unconditionally. I want to love someone unconditionally.
This won't happen until I'm happy the way I am. Nobody's going to fall in love with someone who's depressed with her place in the world. No one wants someone who's sad and tired all the time. They all want fun and intelligence. And happiness. I can't expect someone else to make me happy. I need to be happy first, and then I can be loved the way I long to be loved.
It's all backwards. All I want to do is cry and have somebody comfort me. But there's no one here to comfort me. I need someone inside the walls before they get built any higher. But they just keep going up and up. Soon it'll be too late. Too late for me and my happiness