到处风流，程还年轻。
和你们一块儿风流的女生，能够满足你们。
和你们一块儿风流的女生，能过让你们快乐 。
和你们一块儿风流的女生，能过让你们玩得痛快。
和你们一块儿风流的女生，能过让你们忘了烦恼。
和你们一块儿风流的女生，能过让你们做真真的自己。
但，这一切都只是短暂的不是吗？
玩够了，玩疯了，就会要平静的生活。
因为终于长大了，了解之前的一切，都只能让你快乐一整子。
之前的一切，都只是短暂的把烦恼丢到脑后。
总有一天，还是得面对一切。
然后，你们就会寻找好好女生。
又或者，你们终于看到一直再你身边默默付出，默默关心，默默等待的她。
Then you realised, that they are the only true “wife material”, the one angel that you can live your rest of your life with and depend on her.
然而，一早就发现她们的好的好先生怎么办呢？
女人啊，真蠢。
宁可相信听到的，也不可相信自己眼睛目睹的一切一切。
他的一句对不起，心又软了。
这些男生啊，仗着懂得美言几句，就吃定女生们。
这些男生啊，以为自己很有魅力，就吃定女生们。
对他们而言，爱情是一场游戏。
对他们而言，爱情是一场盛战。
爱情对他们而言，自有输与赢。
而他们这些男生，永远都是赢家 。。。
P.S. An overdue post.
Showing posts with label Regrets. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Regrets. Show all posts
Saturday, 13 April 2013
Monday, 7 January 2013
Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
Once upon a time, I affirmed with my everything that I would do all to make you regret.
They say things that don’t kill you would definitely make you stronger.
Indeed. I thought that that would kill me, that you would kill me.
Then I realized, I was wrong.
To forgive but not to forget - things happened and we couldn’t undo them.
I know I may seem as a loser on the surface, ranting on the same damn old thing that wont change a thing. Freak. Loser. It’s just hard for this, to me.
Give time time, it would get better one day.
We know. It’s just hard now.
Nickie, I’m feeling a little bad now. In fact, horrible.
A game that I took part in unknowingly, and he won.
Please let this gives me strength instead.
I have faced the worst, I just need to overcome this hurdle that’s bothering and affecting me this badly.
I will become better, wiser, and happier.
Give me reminders. I don’t want things like this to destroy me.
“Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.”
I need to find that peace, within me, more than anything else.
They say things that don’t kill you would definitely make you stronger.
Indeed. I thought that that would kill me, that you would kill me.
Then I realized, I was wrong.
To forgive but not to forget - things happened and we couldn’t undo them.
I know I may seem as a loser on the surface, ranting on the same damn old thing that wont change a thing. Freak. Loser. It’s just hard for this, to me.
Give time time, it would get better one day.
We know. It’s just hard now.
Nickie, I’m feeling a little bad now. In fact, horrible.
A game that I took part in unknowingly, and he won.
Please let this gives me strength instead.
I have faced the worst, I just need to overcome this hurdle that’s bothering and affecting me this badly.
I will become better, wiser, and happier.
Give me reminders. I don’t want things like this to destroy me.
“Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.”
I need to find that peace, within me, more than anything else.
Monday, 10 December 2012
The arrival of doomsday 2012, still valid?
Have you ever wondered which hurts the most? Saying something and wishing you hadn't? Or saying nothing and wishing you had?
I guess the most important things are the hardest things to say.
Don't be afraid to tell someone you love them. If you do, they might break your heart ... If you don't, you might break theirs.
Have you ever decided not to become a couple because you were so afraid of losing what you already had with that person? Your heart decides whom it likes and whom it doesn't.
You can't tell your heart what to do. It does it on its own ... When you least suspect it, or even when you don't want it to.
Have you ever wanted to love someone with everything you had, but that other person was too afraid to let you? Too many of us stay walled up because we are too afraid to care too much ... for fear that the other person does not care as much, or even at all.
Have you ever denied your feelings for someone because your fear of rejection was too hard to handle? We tell lies when we are afraid ... afraid of what wedon't know, afraid of what others will think, afraid of what will be found out about us.
But every time we tell a lie, the thing we fear grows stronger.
Life is all about risks and it requires you to jump.
Don't be a person who has to look back and wonder what they would have done, or could have had.
What would you do if every time you fell in love you had to say good-bye?
What would you do if every time you wanted someone they would never be there? What would you do if your best friend died tomorrow and you never got to tell them how you felt? What would you do if you loved someone more than ever and you couldn't have them? What would you do if you never got the chance to say I am friends with all of my family and they know I love them?
Just random thoughts.
I wonder how many of us still believe that the doomsday in 2012 will arrive.
I remember clearly I did alot of research and there were many documentary and all that support the arrival of this day. I was really paranoid. I mean, many of us were when we watch this movie back then, right?
Oh well, even without this doomsday, whatever might still happen too.
So, don't live with regrets.
Choose a path you really want to be, not of others expectations, not of a life that ruin you or going against your principles and values.
I guess the most important things are the hardest things to say.
Don't be afraid to tell someone you love them. If you do, they might break your heart ... If you don't, you might break theirs.
Have you ever decided not to become a couple because you were so afraid of losing what you already had with that person? Your heart decides whom it likes and whom it doesn't.
You can't tell your heart what to do. It does it on its own ... When you least suspect it, or even when you don't want it to.
Have you ever wanted to love someone with everything you had, but that other person was too afraid to let you? Too many of us stay walled up because we are too afraid to care too much ... for fear that the other person does not care as much, or even at all.
Have you ever denied your feelings for someone because your fear of rejection was too hard to handle? We tell lies when we are afraid ... afraid of what wedon't know, afraid of what others will think, afraid of what will be found out about us.
But every time we tell a lie, the thing we fear grows stronger.
Life is all about risks and it requires you to jump.
Don't be a person who has to look back and wonder what they would have done, or could have had.
What would you do if every time you fell in love you had to say good-bye?
What would you do if every time you wanted someone they would never be there? What would you do if your best friend died tomorrow and you never got to tell them how you felt? What would you do if you loved someone more than ever and you couldn't have them? What would you do if you never got the chance to say I am friends with all of my family and they know I love them?
Just random thoughts.
I wonder how many of us still believe that the doomsday in 2012 will arrive.
I remember clearly I did alot of research and there were many documentary and all that support the arrival of this day. I was really paranoid. I mean, many of us were when we watch this movie back then, right?
Oh well, even without this doomsday, whatever might still happen too.
So, don't live with regrets.
Choose a path you really want to be, not of others expectations, not of a life that ruin you or going against your principles and values.
Friday, 30 November 2012
Time to grow, grow up!
If I were ever given a chance to live my life again, I would be in such dilemma.
I know I have said a lot of times that I regretted many things that I have did, that I would want to make it better so damn badly.
Yet again, if my life were to start all over again, would I be so mentally strong and overcome all the impossible that I once encountered?
Without going through certain things, we would never grow.
Just like the illustration that when others warned you about how much you should protect yourself from the outside world, advices just couldn't seep into our damn thick skull.
Physicalism doesn't hold all the time doesn't it? I might have all the theories on the negative consequences of indulging in certain acts, but when I really experience it, I would then really learn how painful it is. #Afterphiloeffect~
I know it doesn't really apply here, but I just wanted to sound sophisticated. *bleah~
Diverge slightly here, the philosophy paper I sat for just now was really hard.
Everyone's had different answers and it is really scary. I don't wish to fail, I need my GPA to be above 3.5 please.
Showed Jon & Nickie the paper after. And the typical comment that one would give for philo, "Mind-fucked".
To think that I'm still contemplating if I should minor in philosophy, really sound like a joke.
Pulling back, have you ever wanted to view yourself from other people's point of view?
I bet many did so, at least a few times. We have said so many times, that only we can ultimately judge ourselves. Yet, how many of us could actually overcome that?
In NUS, particularly in FASS, we have to learn to speak up during tutorials.
I was so afraid initially; I lost count of the times I wanted to skip lessons because I felt so uncomfortable.
I was so afraid of being laughed at, I felt so shallow.
And so, I suffered a lot. I will make the next semester a better one. I have have to step out of my own comfort zone. Before this one thing really kill me; I have got to face this in the outside world too. It is a reality that if I don't learn to speak up for myself when I'm out there, I would be crushed. I will never make it big, I will never make it to where I wanna be.
Jon was at Starbucks coincidentally; he gave me a free tall Caramel Hot Chocolate Drink.
And dearest Nickie was so sweet she bought food for me because she doesn't want me to starve. Love her so so much!
I guess I have a myriad of things to do, to reflect upon after my papers. Now I just have to focus for this one last paper :)
I know I have said a lot of times that I regretted many things that I have did, that I would want to make it better so damn badly.
Yet again, if my life were to start all over again, would I be so mentally strong and overcome all the impossible that I once encountered?
Without going through certain things, we would never grow.
Just like the illustration that when others warned you about how much you should protect yourself from the outside world, advices just couldn't seep into our damn thick skull.
Physicalism doesn't hold all the time doesn't it? I might have all the theories on the negative consequences of indulging in certain acts, but when I really experience it, I would then really learn how painful it is. #Afterphiloeffect~
I know it doesn't really apply here, but I just wanted to sound sophisticated. *bleah~
Diverge slightly here, the philosophy paper I sat for just now was really hard.
Everyone's had different answers and it is really scary. I don't wish to fail, I need my GPA to be above 3.5 please.
Showed Jon & Nickie the paper after. And the typical comment that one would give for philo, "Mind-fucked".
To think that I'm still contemplating if I should minor in philosophy, really sound like a joke.
Pulling back, have you ever wanted to view yourself from other people's point of view?
I bet many did so, at least a few times. We have said so many times, that only we can ultimately judge ourselves. Yet, how many of us could actually overcome that?
In NUS, particularly in FASS, we have to learn to speak up during tutorials.
I was so afraid initially; I lost count of the times I wanted to skip lessons because I felt so uncomfortable.
I was so afraid of being laughed at, I felt so shallow.
And so, I suffered a lot. I will make the next semester a better one. I have have to step out of my own comfort zone. Before this one thing really kill me; I have got to face this in the outside world too. It is a reality that if I don't learn to speak up for myself when I'm out there, I would be crushed. I will never make it big, I will never make it to where I wanna be.
Jon was at Starbucks coincidentally; he gave me a free tall Caramel Hot Chocolate Drink.
And dearest Nickie was so sweet she bought food for me because she doesn't want me to starve. Love her so so much!
I guess I have a myriad of things to do, to reflect upon after my papers. Now I just have to focus for this one last paper :)
Monday, 19 November 2012
Girls' Talk not advisable!
Introducing my new favourite; GREEN TEA LATTE!
I fall in love with my first mouth; & I kept acting like a kid after.I kept reiterating that I am so blissful because this particular drink just make me feel that way, make my entire day such a lovely one.
There were so many people in Starbucks that day. As good citizens, we do not want to hold up that place, so we decided to head to library after awhile.
Eunice was complaining that Starbucks was really stuffy then; I blamed the weather.
Library was a more conducive environment anyway; we studied at the café. It was not too quiet, nor too noisy, just nice.
Did I mention I couldn’t stay in a too quiet environment for too long? I would never step into the reading room unless I as last resort. It’s like you could hear so clearly when anyone just flip their books. That’s bad, to me.
Anyway, there was this group of girls who were having a really weird conversation at the Starbucks. I didn’t mean to eardrop, but apparently they were talking too loudly that I couldn’t focus on my revision. Damn.
I have no idea why they are holding a meeting there; one of the girls was confused if she had sexual activity with a guy that she likes when she was drunk the other day. Hmm.
Okay, moving on. We went Admiralty Place for dinner. Wanted to head to Marsiling Ba Xian Zai, but they were closed down. I didn’t even know about it, ohwell.
So we headed to Admiralty Place Food Court instead.
If you did realize, girls like to keep recapping the same old damn thing that’s bothering them.
And it’s not like talking things out that is bad, but rather, not finding solutions to it that is unhealthy. Reinforcing these negative thoughts, adding hatred and making ourselves more boiled is the only thing we got in the end usually.
So, this time we didn’t. We forced ourselves to admit things, and make decisions on things that are bothering us.
And one thing, I hate it when girls say story about an event, be it another guy or whatsoever, and add their own elements into every single event.
Though I have to admit I did it at times too. Bleh. hahaha!
Thursday, 15 November 2012
Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.
Revenge S2E4: They say that let he who is without sin cast the fire stone. And to be without sin requires absolute forgiveness.
But when your memories are freshly opened as wounds, forgiveness is the most unnatural of all human emotions.
I couldn't agree more to that.
Dearest Nickie must be wondering what exactly happened that destroyed such a big part of me.
When I have decided not to protect that someone anymore, I will come to you.
Yet again, the more anger towards the past you carry in you heart, the less capable you are of loving in the present.
If I want to forget someone, and move on, I must give up hating them.
It's hard to forget someone you hate, because hatred takes pieces of your heart - thereby this person stays within your heart.
If you want to forget someone, let go of the hate, and create peace in your heart instead.
It's your road, and yours alone. others may walk it with you, but no one can walk it for you.
Whatever others say are deem useless if you do not want to let it go.
Stop holding on to what hurts, and make room for what feels good. Only I can make that happen.
Noted.
Yes, I do need reminder like this one.
Everyone who is in your life is meant to be a part of that journey, but not all of them are meant to stay.
Never cry for that person who doesn't know the value of your tears.
So just please stop going back to the past.
Dear past, just stop freaking tap on our shoulder and force us to look back.
Someone ever told me that it's useless, because the other party has ale moved on.
Staying at the same spot and crying over whatever has happened would not change anything.
Don't degrade yourself.
Might not be tonight, tomorrow of the next day, but everything's gonna be okay.
Eunice told me that everything's will be fine in the end. If' it is not okay, it is not the end(:
A little note to the girls are out there,
"Don't complain about someone not treating you right. If you know you deserve better, why are you with them?"
Don't bloody hold on to a relationship because he is your first; don't believe in fairytales please.
Don't bloody hold on to a relationship because it has been a long one; it's always an advantage for guys when it comes to this.
Don't bloody hold on to a relationship because you have given them your first; fuck those shits and never do it with them again.
DON't Don't don't become someone else you yourself don't even recognise; that's their ultimate aim - to destroy us.
Don't let them win this game. Yes, I see these as games.
Be who you are, hold on to your values and beliefs.
They are still many beautiful things and people in this world.
Be brave and explore them, find new meanings in life, pursue new dreams, live it to the fullest.
Don't let this little set back fail you.
You are still YOU.
As long as you allow yourself to.
I found my new directions :)
But when your memories are freshly opened as wounds, forgiveness is the most unnatural of all human emotions.
I couldn't agree more to that.
Dearest Nickie must be wondering what exactly happened that destroyed such a big part of me.
When I have decided not to protect that someone anymore, I will come to you.
Yet again, the more anger towards the past you carry in you heart, the less capable you are of loving in the present.
If I want to forget someone, and move on, I must give up hating them.
It's hard to forget someone you hate, because hatred takes pieces of your heart - thereby this person stays within your heart.
If you want to forget someone, let go of the hate, and create peace in your heart instead.
It's your road, and yours alone. others may walk it with you, but no one can walk it for you.
Whatever others say are deem useless if you do not want to let it go.
Stop holding on to what hurts, and make room for what feels good. Only I can make that happen.
Noted.
Yes, I do need reminder like this one.
Everyone who is in your life is meant to be a part of that journey, but not all of them are meant to stay.
Never cry for that person who doesn't know the value of your tears.
So just please stop going back to the past.
Dear past, just stop freaking tap on our shoulder and force us to look back.
Someone ever told me that it's useless, because the other party has ale moved on.
Staying at the same spot and crying over whatever has happened would not change anything.
Don't degrade yourself.
Might not be tonight, tomorrow of the next day, but everything's gonna be okay.
Eunice told me that everything's will be fine in the end. If' it is not okay, it is not the end(:
A little note to the girls are out there,
"Don't complain about someone not treating you right. If you know you deserve better, why are you with them?"
Don't bloody hold on to a relationship because he is your first; don't believe in fairytales please.
Don't bloody hold on to a relationship because it has been a long one; it's always an advantage for guys when it comes to this.
Don't bloody hold on to a relationship because you have given them your first; fuck those shits and never do it with them again.
DON't Don't don't become someone else you yourself don't even recognise; that's their ultimate aim - to destroy us.
Don't let them win this game. Yes, I see these as games.
Be who you are, hold on to your values and beliefs.
They are still many beautiful things and people in this world.
Be brave and explore them, find new meanings in life, pursue new dreams, live it to the fullest.
Don't let this little set back fail you.
You are still YOU.
As long as you allow yourself to.
I found my new directions :)
Saturday, 3 November 2012
Stumbling back to those days
I wonder how are you doing now?
I see that you found your new love; but I'm still stuck here, missing the old days.
I knew I would regret, but that's the only thing I could do for you then.
In this life, we would never be friends again. I don't believe that love would fade; or perhaps I really like the feeling of me being myself when I am with you.
I wanted to text you, to give you a call, to hug you from behind once more and thank you from the bottom of my heart, for all unforgettable memories. They were beautiful, to love and to be loved.
I knew you held on to your promises till as long as you could, but life needs to move on. Before that killed you.
I know it's unfair for me to hate you, for that I allowed things to happen, to turn out this ugly.
We said we would still be friends no matter; you asked what happened to this.
I thought I could, but I over-estimated myself.
You know it clearly that I needed time, you said you would wait.
But you rushed into things, and I gave in after awhile.
Then you turn your back on me, shot right through my heart when I was ready.
I should have known, guys were a bastard back then would most likely be one again.
Perhaps my life was too beautiful, and I chose to ignore all the dark sides. I trusted you, I gave you everything that you needed, to prove that I was trying hard enough; you should know better, you should have felt it.
I have decided to forgive you, though anger may come gusting back in no time. I would forgive, but I would never forget. I know I need to learn from my mistakes, and not to regret.
It's so so tough though; values that I hold so dearly to me were being destroyed.
Sometimes I wonder how long can I hold on for.
Do I really have to change that way?
I have been blamed, for being too selfless, for being too gullible, for being too innocent, for being too optimistic. Am I really one? I don't think so, not at all. I'm just really selfish and only chose to believe in all the happy-ending.
I don't know what I can do to make myself at least feel better.
I'm so tired .. I wish there's someone out there who knows.
I dont want to cry myself to sleep. I don't want to be a weak. I don't want to be a loser who just keep on ranting. But I need a place to let it all out.
I need it, so badly. A place where I would not be judge, excluding myself.
People asked why I no longer like slow melancholy love songs; I just don't want to read into the lyrics anymore, to wallow in self-pity, to beat myself up after.
I know there are so much things in life that I can look forward to, so much more that I can do.
I know I can't go back and undo things.
But dear past, can you please please please stop tapping on my shoulder?
I dont want to look back; this internal struggle is really killing me. Before I recovered from the first nightmare, the second one came haunting me.
Courage, I need you. To face all these mistakes. To embrace life once more.
I know I won't go into any relationship anymore, not any time soon at least. I hate the me I am now.
Can one day it really happened that all were just a nightmare?
Saturday, 22 September 2012
Marriage
"I wanna get married at the age of 18!"
I'm pretty sure most of my friends know that was my dream since I've memory. *bangwallanddie, I'm far away from that.
Single life isn't that miserable actually no responsibility, don't have to account for anybody. But then, you might feel terrible on those lonely nights. You longed to receive a hug or cuddle with your crush. *iknowhowthatfeels.
Then I start to ponder, am I still that old me, who's really looking forward to marriage? Or will I just cry and regret after?
Someone told me that these days, the most worrying thing is that people get into relationship too fast. They don't even know each other and they rush into it. And worst still, getting too involved that regret doesn't even help.
I hope I've grown up over the years. That I'm much more mature in handling relationship. It's always easy to give advices or scream at your best friend and tell them they are obviously blind and wrong. But when it comes back to you, you won't feel that way.
Linger and linger on. Why are we humans so so weak? Of should I say we are sentiment beings that's why we just can't let go of certain things when making decisions.
I wonder how people do it when they assured others they won't let their emotions obstruct them from their work, their performance. Is it possible in any way? *hmmm.
On a side note, I still wanna get married okay. I guess it's all girls, or most girls dreams? To be a princess for once and lead that happy ever after days. *cantblameme; I'm the typical girl too!
I'm pretty sure most of my friends know that was my dream since I've memory. *bangwallanddie, I'm far away from that.
Single life isn't that miserable actually no responsibility, don't have to account for anybody. But then, you might feel terrible on those lonely nights. You longed to receive a hug or cuddle with your crush. *iknowhowthatfeels.
Then I start to ponder, am I still that old me, who's really looking forward to marriage? Or will I just cry and regret after?
Someone told me that these days, the most worrying thing is that people get into relationship too fast. They don't even know each other and they rush into it. And worst still, getting too involved that regret doesn't even help.
I hope I've grown up over the years. That I'm much more mature in handling relationship. It's always easy to give advices or scream at your best friend and tell them they are obviously blind and wrong. But when it comes back to you, you won't feel that way.
Linger and linger on. Why are we humans so so weak? Of should I say we are sentiment beings that's why we just can't let go of certain things when making decisions.
I wonder how people do it when they assured others they won't let their emotions obstruct them from their work, their performance. Is it possible in any way? *hmmm.
On a side note, I still wanna get married okay. I guess it's all girls, or most girls dreams? To be a princess for once and lead that happy ever after days. *cantblameme; I'm the typical girl too!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)