Old days, I miss you :)

Hello, I miss the whole days. When I hang out with all my besties & darlings and have so much fun. I looked through all the photos I’ve taken for the past 2.5 years and I’m so amazed of all the things I’ve went through. Some of which I almost couldn’t recall till those photos trigger back the awesome memories :D Though I’m single now, though I so wish I could be somebody’s, though I so wish to be pampered like a princess, though at times I was attached by that lonely-Im alone feel, I want to thank god! From the bottom of my heart, for giving me such a blessed life. Life has been pretty great for me & I shall no longer ponder so much & make it difficult for myself. I shall stop regretting decisions I’ve made over and over again. Look back Peckyong, all have been so well for you! :D

Don't say, anymore

Sometimes there’s nothing to say. Sometimes silence expresses more than words. Picking up the phone, dialing a number, it can do more damage than good. But humans are afflicted with this obsessive desire to talk things to death. So we make things worse by trying to make things better.

Lao Di Fang

Lao Di Fang
9 Penang Road, #B1-12 Park Mall, S238459

Previous Review

Sambal Fish is damn good; it was so spicy we just keep wanting more!

Desserts are my fav :D

Fav cake: Rasberry Cheese Cake :D
I had my first Rasberry Cheese Cake somewhere in Vivo with my first love, & I fall in love with it immediately :D
Couldn't find anything close to that taste any longer idk why :(

I don't really like to try new favors. In fact I don't really like to try new things. But I always do, in the end.
I love to stay in comfort zone, I dislike changes. Though I don't seem like one. I hate it when you are used to that someone, then he or she left you.
讨厌让你习惯他了，又选择离开。

On a side note, Ray ray aka banana boy is my favorite boy :D
I wish I'm his mummy, hahaha.
He used to be mischievous, running all around, climb up and down giving me a hard time; but I still love him.

He has a little brother now so he carry himself better :D

Dinner at Classic Lao Di Fang for dinner :)
Eunice's favourite restaurant to celebrate her belated birthday :)
Happy Belated Gorgeous :))

Then again,

& then I realized I was too harsh last night.
How selfish could I be. He said he went through a hard time to make this decision. I should have trusted him. Though I know the rest would kill me if I were to think this way.
But he's not that bad by nature. Really. He isn't a playboy. Because till the end, I believe that he didn't play me.
That I shouldn't have judge him right from the start.
Maybe we just aren't meant to be.
So boy, I really do hope you will meet a better girl, a better someone whos really worth your wait, someone who will touches your heart and make you love like no others. Someone who genuinely love you in return and have your happily ever after.
I'll pray for you. Just, don't ever do things for the moment, or give words and promises at that moment when you aren't sure how much you can deliver or if you can take that responsibility.
Everything else about you us great, really.

Unexpectedly

I know and I knew that it will happen some day. But not this soon.

Maybe it was really too much of me. For making him wait that long.
Maybe it was really me that I'm such a fickle, think too much about the future, that I dont dare to try it out, to give both of us that chance. Maybe I was really a coward, that I don't dare to get hurt. Maybe I was really too selfish, to commit and love another.
But I don't think I'm such a cold blooded person.
Or maybe, I'm just wrong. I'm just not good enough to worth his wait.
That I can no longer try to help him be a better person. Maybe all the faults lie with me.
I can't because, he's tired and start forgetting all the little things he sacrificed for me. Maybe I really went overboard and demand for too much.

Maybe I'm not the person he should waste his effort and time on and he realizes that.

Ya. Tonight will be the final night it's happening. I'll cry myself to sleep cause I don't want to hold it back anymore.
And TMR, I'll be a different person. Someone tougher. I won't believe that any guy would change for me. I won't take words from guys like him. I won't. Trust. Anymore.

It's so so hard. I was warned by the whole world. Yet I chose to trust him.
And this is what I get in return.
Being too innocent, I was just dumb.
So for now, i will love myself more than anything else.
No one else can hurt me anymore.

So much hope I have in this world..
He destroy all my hope. And now I'm force to view the world as such a horrible place. Full of jerks out there who love themselves more than anything else. And now, I just have to do the same, to protect myself.

To be in love

Now i feel this way. I want to fall in love. I want to fall desperately and uncontrollably in love. I want my every breath to be as important to his existence as it is to my own. I want to feel empty inside when he's not beside me. I want to feel absolutely perfect when his arms are around me. I want to be miserable when he's unhappy. I want to be ecstatic when his life is going good. I want to be co-dependant. I don't want to be alone. I want to be loved unconditionally. I want to love someone unconditionally.
This won't happen until I'm happy the way I am. Nobody's going to fall in love with someone who's depressed with her place in the world. No one wants someone who's sad and tired all the time. They all want fun and intelligence. And happiness. I can't expect someone else to make me happy. I need to be happy first, and then I can be loved the way I long to be loved.
It's all backwards. All I want to do is cry and have somebody comfort me. But there's no one here to comfort me. I need someone inside the walls before they get built any higher. But they just keep going up and up. Soon it'll be too late. Too late for me and my happiness

Let me be

I wish,
you're closer to me than my shadow. no matter what other say, please dont choose to run away from it. trust me, dont let go my hand.
Everytime before meeting you, i'm so excited. walking towards you, getting close to you makes my heart pounds so fast. holding your hand, your hug, your kiss, makes me feel i'm loved. because having so much in mind, sometimes uttering a word seems so hard. bidding goodbye is the worse thing. how much i dont want to leave you; how much i want that forever. whenever you're not by my side it's worst than hell. missing you every moment you're not with me. though i didnt say but it all meant the same thing. i love you baby.

Life is too short to wake up with regrets. So love the people who treat you right ... Forget about the one's who don't ... Believe everything happens for a reason. If you get a second chance, grab it with both hands. If it changes your life, let it. Nobody said life would be easy, they just promised it would be worth it.

你最近还好吗？

不管有多么的不安和害怕，我还是没有勇气把爱留下。如果那时选择说出口，那结果是怎样？过了就过了，回头也不一定会看得见你。说放下就可以吗？说再见就不见？我不知道我可不可以，因为还是不舍得。

我还爱着一个人　
但愿 回到美好的从前
也许痛的感觉　证明了爱的深浅
不然为什么我还不撤退 ...

想我还是不够成熟
还达不到你的要求
我真的没有想的太多
只是怀念 你走以后
离开难道真的是解脱
难道真的要试过几次了以后才懂
倔强说不痛 假装什么伤都没有
倔强抬起头 决不让眼泪往下流
倔强说不痛 假装什么伤都没有
真的不难过 笑着和你挥——挥手
如果有一刻 我们有缘在见
你会不会想起说过的永远

我知道故事不会太曲折
我总会遇见一个 什么人
陪我过没有了他的人生
成家立业之类的等等
他做了他觉得对的选择
我只好祝福他 真的对了
爱不到我最想要爱的人
谁还能要我怎样呢
我爱的人 不是我的爱人
他心里每一寸 都属于另一个人
他真幸福 幸福得真残忍
让我又爱又恨 他的爱怎么那么深
我爱的人 他已有了爱人
从他们的眼神 说明了我不可能
每当听见 他或她说「我们」
就像听见爱情 永恒的嘲笑声

对你的思念是一天又一天。孤单的我还是没有改变。美丽的梦何时才能出现？亲爱的，好想对你说一句我爱你。想起了去年的这个时候，你的心到底在想些什么、为什么留下这个结局让我承受？最爱你的人是我，我怎么舍得你难过。在我最需要你的时候，你从没出现过。对你付出了这么多，你却没有感动过 。。。

我想我知道，眼泪的味道。曾经付出的每一天，每一年，我不曾想逃。受伤的翅膀，总有一天会慢慢，慢慢的变好，能飞得更高。。。

sweethearts never die ; even at the last minute. your smile, your laughter, your everything, i need them ...
i am thinking of you. i am caring about you. i misses you. i want to talk to you. i want to be with you. i hope you aren't in trouble. i am thankful for the support you have provided. i want to hold your hand. i hope everything turns out all right. i want you to be happy. i want you to find her. i did celebrate your successes. i want to give you a gift. i thinks that you ARE a gift. i love you. i am thinking of you and smiling. i want to be your shoulder to cry on.

暗恋会幸福？ 明恋要付出？

暗恋喜欢一个人好累
流泪在数不尽的黑夜
想念变成了习惯
想你一遍遍你却好远
如果你不当我是朋友
而是其他重要的角色
是否我就可以占有你每个笑容

暗恋喜欢一个人好美
想像你轻轻搂我的肩
走在人挤人的街
抓紧你的手甜蜜无限

昨天你送我一个笑脸
今天你经过了我身边
每天你这样一举一动
都影响我的悲伤喜悦
昨天你多看了我一眼
今天我有些心不在焉
哪天我才会有勇气勇敢面对?