Showing posts with label Words. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Words. Show all posts

Friday, 8 February 2013

Another day - yet I learnt to treasure my life more now


I started off my day by doing SW Project with my classmates.
I was late, damn.

For once, I was pretty not myself.
I was rather quiet. Perhaps it's the first time we actually spent time together. 
Then it poured, made my day worst. I felt.

Someone shared with me her personal life stories today. 
From being in a not-so-welled paid family, to meeting a two-timer boyfriend, then being backstabbed by her loved ones. 
She is really strong, and I admire that she could still stand tall and earn a good place now, with a much better boy. On top of that, she still believes that the world is a good place, and tomorrow will always get better. :') 

Then I realised, I'm so blessed. 
I have yet to experience a really bad thing like hers, nothing came close to it. 
I wonder if I could still be as positive if I were hit with such incidents. 
For now, I want you to know you are really a beautiful one. We aren't born to make everyone likes and understands us. If they choose to hurt and not accept us, there's a limit to what we can do. Ultimately, we just have to do what is right to us, and be true to ourselves. :)


My younger brother (handsome right! - he's single by the way, *hinthint* HAHAHA) is enlisting soon, a day before valentines. No more roses from him :(
I know you will do well; remember to eat more!



& he gave me this :D
Strawberry cheese fruit pizza for supper :D

Let me post some over-dued pictures!
I met up with my girlfriend yesterday, Nickie :)
She taught me piano. 
I know I'm really slow when it comes to picking up new things, but she was really patient with me! :')
I love you :)




We had a drink at bucks a few days back, actually to do some work but failed. Damn!


And hey, it's out! JJ Lin. His new album will be released on the 13th March, and preorder starts on the 20th Feb. 4 days after my birthday! *hinthint! HAHAHA.


Do support him! He chose to work with A Sa. :) He's mainly working with people he had worked with for the past 10 years! And of course, some new faces too! I'm so excited! :D:D:D

Tuesday, 5 February 2013

Happy girls are the prettiest - I say!

Never take someone's feeling for granted, because you never know how much courage they took to show it to you.

Fear of rejection; yet you know that's the best solution. The irony here.
So for now, I won't force myself to have a space in your life. If you really know my worth, you will make one for me.

They say if you do not go after what what you want, you'll never have it.
They say if you do not ask, the answer will always be no.
They say if you do not step forward, you will always be in the same place.

Yet, I wish I didn't make it too obvious and thus hard on you.

I have always been proud of my heart.
It's been played, stabbed, cheater, burned and broken.


But somehow, it still works! :')




On a side note, I know it appears I am pretty obsessed with JJ Lin these days.
There are no other reason that I'm more than looking forward to his 10th Album - Stories Untold.
He worked extremely hard for this, so do support. It'll be good definitely!
因你 而在 Stories Untold will be releasing via major radios after 2/6 10AM Asia (US PST 2/5 6PM).

US - LA Chinese Radio AM1300 美國洛杉磯中文電台 http://www.am1300.com/index.php?m=content&c=index&a=lists&catid=8

Canada Chinese Raido 加拿大中文電台 AM1470 http://www.am1470.com/live/pop_live1470.php FM 96.1 http://www.am1470.com/live/pop_live961.php

Taiwan 台灣 Hit FM http://www.hitoradio.com/newweb/onair2013.php

Hong Kong 903 香港903商業電台 - 雲泥鐘情 http://www.881903.com/Page/Zh-TW/downloadtoolbar.aspx

Singapore 新加坡 1003 http://apps.radioactive.sg/sph/public/ufm1003/

Malaysia 馬來西亞 My FM http://apps.radioactive.sg/amp/public/myfm/

Mainland China 中國內地 Music Radio http://www.musicradio.cc/ City FM http://www.dzwww.com/cityfm/

Saturday, 2 February 2013

Pause, think again.

At some point of time, you would realize that you have done so much for someone and the next only possible thing to do is to stop.

It's not like you are giving up or not trying hard enough. Sometimes there is a need to draw a line between determination from desperation.

What is truly yours will eventually be yours. What is not, no matter how hard you try, will never be.

I didn't change; you just never knew me.

I wasn't really feeling too good when that feeling of emptiness overpowers me.
I have no idea if it was you.
You know, it's so common for teenagers to have these feelings overpowering them. I read it somewhere before.
Teenagers like to compare their life with others, and often felt that they were a 'loner' - either they don't know where they are heading, they have no directions, their life weren't as happening, or that they have less friends, or they don't have as many people loving and adoring them, whatever.

I felt like breaking down for that moment. But I held back.
I felt lost, so so lost.
For that moment, I questioned myself many things. And it just got worst.
Am glad there were people talking about random stuff to pull my mind off these horrible feelings.

I know how scary this blog title sounded.
It is as if I were being accused by someone I least expected.

Hey no, that was just a random line that cross my mind.
I'm stepping into the 20th world in a matter of 2 weeks time.
How much have I grown? How much have I changed?

Yes, in terms of knowledge and wisdom I guess I could say proudly I definitely have gained a lot more; given that I have went through much, especially these two years.

And so, how should I lead my next 20 years, to make it a better one, for myself, my my family, for my friends, for my loved ones?

I have a dream; a dream I never once admitted to any.
It sounded too far away from me that I don't dare to think about it any longer.
Yet recently, it has been calling out for me, louder and louder.
I'm afraid, still.

Confidence.
Courage.
These 2 Cs are the one I have been dying for.

Frankly, I have much more now, compared to the me say in lower Secondary.
Still, I don't think I have an adequate amount of them.
I doubt myself in a myriad of things that I do, even when I was told otherwise.
I doubt my own capabilities, my judgment, many times still.

But one thing I'm certain now at least, (I have shared this with my new friend Sing Ping in one of the Social Work Tutorial) I cannot lock myself out in search of answers.
Maybe it might work, but it will take a longer time.

I have got to get out and meet new people, gain new perspectives, allow myself to see through their eyes, a different world.


Only then perhaps  I will find the answer to what's life, how should I lead mine.

Monday, 7 January 2013

Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.

Once upon a time, I affirmed with my everything that I would do all to make you regret.
They say things that don’t kill you would definitely make you stronger.
Indeed. I thought that that would kill me, that you would kill me.

Then I realized, I was wrong.
To forgive but not to forget - things happened and we couldn’t undo them.
I know I may seem as a loser on the surface, ranting on the same damn old thing that wont change a thing. Freak. Loser. It’s just hard for this, to me.

Give time time, it would get better one day.
We know. It’s just hard now.
Nickie, I’m feeling a little bad now. In fact, horrible.
A game that I took part in unknowingly, and he won.

Please let this gives me strength instead.
I have faced the worst, I just need to overcome this hurdle that’s bothering and affecting me this badly.
I will become better, wiser, and happier.

Give me reminders. I don’t want things like this to destroy me.


“Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.”
I need to find that peace, within me, more than anything else.

Monday, 31 December 2012

Looking back year 2012; dedicate my love for you dearests

I’m thankful for year 2012; I was really happy that the world didn’t come to and end.
Thus I have the opportunity to love still.

This year wasn’t the best of my years; In fact, one of the worst.
To add on to the lists of bad things that hit me this year, I have another piece of bad news: I did not manage the get into Impresario quarter-finals. Damn.
Though I wasn’t expecting much, with my disgraceful performance that day, I was hoping the rest would do so much worst than me. HAHAHA.

Results was horrendous. B- for all modules and a C+ for Psychology almost killed me. GPA of 2.9 was just so unacceptable.
Oh well. Nothing beats what happened in the first half of this year.
Yet, I still believe in love. Dumb ass, I know.

I believe still, that a kiss can beautify souls hearts and thoughts …
When I was younger, my biggest dream was always to be the happiest and prettiest bride in the world!
I so hope that one day I will marry my best friend, the one I laugh with, live for, dream with, the one that I love the most.
I see kids, on their facebook status commenting that they want to get into a relationship when they are barely 13.
Relationship these days seem so fragile, couples break and patch and break again.
People getting together for all other reasons to satisfy they wants except to love and give.
I have made mistakes too. Mistakes that I wouldn’t want to forgive myself for.
Of course we can’t go back in time, to undo things, so we can only look forward!
Whatever it is, all these shits have made me who I am.
For the better or otherwise, I don’t have the answer Better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all.
But I am who I am today because of my past, may be it was the best arrangement. Maybe it was the only way that I could be the best that I can, at least I can start now :) 

我相信天注定的缘分。亲爱的,当你出现时,我或许会错过你。但是,因为有缘,最终一定会在相遇,一定会在一起。不必强求,因为我们上辈子已经说好了。

We are, each of us angels with only one wing; and we can only fly by embracing one another.

Moving on, new Year Resolutions for Year 2013?
I would skip this portion this year. Not because it’s the same as year 2012; awkward~

This year, I would like to dedicate this post to all my special dearests.
Precisely this was such a bad year, my ties with some grown stronger :)

Aaron, we have not known each other for long to be exact. Yet the friendship that we have now is so strong. Though we are all grown up now, and we barely have time to meet up, we know that we will be good friends for long, that we would do all we could to protect this friendship. :)

Christine: It was such a pain seeing that jerk hurt you that way earlier this year. Thank God; God always bless good girls like you. I’m so glad you moved one and found your love in the end. You were so brave, so daring. On a side note, you are too selfless. You always do so so much for all the people around you. At the cost of making yourself so tired at times. Love yourself a little more alright? :)

Eunice: If not of the same Fo Tang, I wonder if we would meet still. Life would be in a mess if I don’t have you. I can’t believe how much similar incidents we have went through. Like literally copy and paste. That’s not very nice actually. LOL. Well, that’s precisely why can connect that well too don’t we? You could understand me the way no others would. I don’t have to explain much. I’m so glad I have got you. May we have more opportunities to be there for each other in the years ahead :)

Jia Jia: I’m not too sure if you would have the chance to read this. For a period of time, I was devastated. I thought I lost you. I don’t know what to say, nor what to do. I thought you have changed. We have known each other ever since we were little. It was such a pain. Thankfully, it was over. You wouldn’t know how happy I was when we could talk again like before. Maybe you are still in the age where seeking fun is your top most priority, but don’t neglect certain stuff. Regret is the worst punishment ever. If you need anything, I’m just a call away okay? :)

Jia Min: Soon we would celebrate our 12 years anniversary! Like I have said, you could take off that title from FB anytime; the only condition is that the one that you are having relationship must be with Aaron. You know, the best feeling on earth is when you witness your two best friends get together. I’m so glad you all found each other. :)

Jonathan: You have been such a lovely. Never failed to cheer me up when I needed that. You were always there when I needed you. Like I have said, I looked up to you a lot; such an optimistic gentleman. I really do hope you will find your true love soon; that someone whom deserve you would appear really soon. And so you can be the happiest one on earth; we both agree that that emptiness can only be overcome with love don’t we? :)

Joshua Oh: Nothing is better than having such an awesome neighbor cum bestie! Well, I didn’t expect you to share so much about yourself with me the other day. But I was really happy you did; because it meant that you trust me and that we are closer now, right? I hope that neither of us would move house! I think you would be a good boyfriend next time; you pay attention to little things and would make the effort to go that extra miles. Well, 会顾家的男人都是好男人啦!:)

Joshua Teo: Well to be exact, we aren’t close. But still, you are someone I looked up to so there you go! I miss those little times when you would share your stories because they were always so inspiring. That’s exactly why I idolize you that much. Someone with great ambition, I’m pretty sure you will achieve even more in near future! I hope your grandpa will recover soon. :)

Jun Rong: I admire how direct you are. 直率,超帅的!This year has been hard on us I know. Yet, we have gained some in return like being even closer with our family. I pray with my everything that things will only get better from now on. You have been such a sensible one and should be blessed. I hope we will forge stronger friendship in the years ahead :)

Miao Hui: Longest friendship I guess? Like ever since we were 3? 4? Or 5? I’m really glad that though we have never been in the same school, we are still able to keep in contact somehow. And next year you are finally coming back to BXB. We can have more time or heart-to-heart-talk. :)

Nickie: The one who understands me best; you have always been. We don’t have to call nor talk everyday. Amazingly, we can connect that way still. You are one strong woman. I don’t hope that you would give up and reject all because of him. Trust me, they are the worst that one will ever meet. Nothing will beat us now alright? :)

Pei Hong: Jie jie, I’m so glad I have got you. It’s as if I have had a real jiejie. The way you care and protect and sacrifice and think for others just make you so angelic. I was so happy when you told me that I was chosen as your best friend for that question. May we have greater opportunities to be even closer in upcoming years! And for being such a great listener, thank you :)

Pei Ting: If you were less bimbotic, I guess you would be perfect. LOL, just joking. I love all those little encouragements you gave me; and that you would give me suggestions. Thank you for helping me peer mark many times. For the many little things you did, they actually mean a lot to me. Thank you dear :)

Rong Her: I smiled so widely when you said, “Yes, that’s your smell. I miss you!” With you around, that trip to Taiwan was made worthwhile. I hope that life will do justice to you, so your innocence will stay with you for as long as you live. It would be such a pity if that were being eaten away because of some horrible incidents or people you might meet! Don’t worry, Eunice and I will protect you. :)

Sook hui: You know you are so so much tougher now. Yet I have to remind you, you are no saint. You don’t have to shoulder all the responsibilities everywhere. You have your own life to lead, own expectations to fulfill, own values to hold. I’m so glad that you hang on to RSSB Alumni when most of us were down. Thank you dear :) Really, it’s okay to think for yourself sometimes.

Tanay: Steady do you still love me? Hahaha. Well there aren’t many opportunities for us to catch up this year, but you were always there when I needed to whine and complain. I hope your love would appear soon, so you won’t have to hua-chi everyday and drool over all those hot guys in class. :)

Vinus: I really salute to your 5 years relationship with your prince. Like we have always joke that you guys can start planning for marriage. You are one caring girl and I wanna thank you for helping me stalk people on twitter at times LOL. Okay, that was bad. I won’t do that anymore anyway. :)

Xing Jun: Babe! I’m so glad that I have got you for this whole semester. I would be so lost otherwise. I don’t know if we would be that close still next semester, but you are one awesome person. Fun-loving and full of nonsense and ideas as usual. Let’s work real hard together and do ourselves proud alright? No more skipping of lessons ever if there are webcasts, promise? I mean you have to force me to come to school! :)

Of course this list is not exhaustive.
If you don’t see your name here, you can give me a hug next time when you see me and give me a gentle reminder. LOL.

It’s late and I have passed my sleeping time. I can’t really think now. Pardon me!

Year 2013, please be good. I don’t ask for much, just good health for all.
 It’s my first time, not asking for much.
  I hope it makes a difference.

Wednesday, 28 November 2012

我为何会犯规?

Pen this down at 3am last night.

我为何会犯规? 不是说好了吗?
其实只是不想让你知道。一开始就是有目的的靠近你。
因为一切都太顺利,误以为是天意。
没有防备,没有后备。
后知后觉才领悟, 只是已陷得太深了。

我为何会犯规? 现在退一步还来得及吗?
我为何会犯规? 爱上不该爱的该怎么办?
判出局,你已表明的那么清楚。
可是我,还是想逗留在你身边。

Then words came in, music flow. It's so messed up it doesn't even make much sense.
The only product when the writer is confused herself.
Edited to make it sound like one. A broken pieces that pierce through hearts.
It's like you are thinking about her and I'm thinking about you.

It doesn't apply yet it feels like so. Completed my piece without the full melody.
I might have created chords that do not even exist.
And yet so, we find lyrics that best describe our feelings to be conveyed.

When I can't find that one that really do, I write them instead.
I have a good feeling about this; edited version will not be shared.
Only for my dearests.

Much love, please be safe.
Till I see you again, I miss you so dearly.

Met Aaron before he flew off. I know it's just 21 days.
Blame it on Yan Shen, said that we would meet after exams.
Yet, the next thing he's not returning. Damn.
Shouldn't have made such assumptions that we would definitely have time for our dearests when we are free.
Things don't always go the way you want it to.
Lesson learnt: Stop with whatever you are busy with; turn and show concern for your loved ones. Before it's too late.

Shall end it with a lighter note, I have completed three papers.
So another three to go; one on a Thursday Evening and another on a Friday morning. #Badtimetable.


I can smell the sweetness of holiday approaching I can't wait.